


Heisenberg Territory

by faithinthepoor



Series: Desperate Housewives [11]
Category: Desperate Housewives
Genre: Canon Het Relationship, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-06
Updated: 2013-02-06
Packaged: 2017-11-28 10:14:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,853
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/673272
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/faithinthepoor/pseuds/faithinthepoor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set during Goodbye for Now</p>
            </blockquote>





	Heisenberg Territory

**Author's Note:**

> Follows [Unseemly](http://archiveofourown.org/works/668467), [The Theory of Everything](http://archiveofourown.org/users/faithinthepoor), [Here There Be Dragons](http://archiveofourown.org/works/673221), [Somnambulist](http://archiveofourown.org/works/673229), [Wishin’ and Hopin’](http://archiveofourown.org/works/673233), [Nosology](http://archiveofourown.org/works/673238), [Boundary Violations](http://archiveofourown.org/works/673240), [Fractals](http://archiveofourown.org/works/673250), [Windmill Tilting](http://archiveofourown.org/works/673255) and [Ambitendency](http://archiveofourown.org/works/673262)

The material fluttered down to join the surface of the table for the forth time in close succession but on this occasion it managed to land in a manner that she found acceptable and for that she was probably more annoyed with it than she had been on the previous three attempts when it had failed to meet her expectations. As she smoothed out wrinkles that were all but invisible to the naked eye she found herself resenting the fabric for its now pristine appearance, with this final feat of preparation complete there was nothing to stop her from moving onto the next task on her list which, while necessary, was much more unpalatable. She tells herself that going back to the kitchen to ensure that the food she has prepared hasn’t somehow performed a mass escape in her absence is a responsible act rather than one of avoidance but finds that it hasn’t even unarranged itself on the platters where it was carefully stacked, so there is nothing left to do but deal with her anxiety and cross the street.

Lynette looks flustered as she opens the door, “Am I late, did I get the time wrong? I am not ready, I only sent the kids to the park with the sitter a few minutes ago, you can start without me, and I’ll come over as soon as I can.”

She had expected her presence to be unsettling but not for the reasons that Lynette has listed, “No, it’s the normal time, I just thought that we should talk before hand, I mean we haven’t seen one another since _that_ phone call and, well, things were said and I just thought it would be better if we weren’t seeing each other for the first time since then in a room full of people as it might be uncomfortable.”

“And this isn’t?”

“I thought it would be easier if we didn’t have an audience.”

“So if you wanted to see me alone why have you been avoiding me?”

“I haven’t.”

“Really, cause I have certainly been avoiding you. If we are going to do this, you had better come in.” The closing of the door somehow draws their previously stilted conversation to a halt; she finds that she can’t even bring herself to look at Lynette and wonders how long she can spend surveying the Scavo’s ceiling for cobwebs before it seems rude but Lynette saves her the trouble of having to find out, “So this is just unpleasant isn’t it?”

“Should I go back home and call you? It seemed easier to talk over the phone.”

“It was but then I’d had a few drinks so things were easier all-round,” despite this confession, Lynette is quite to clarify, “not that I was drunk mind you. I am sorry if all the sex talk pushed you too far.”

“It wasn’t just that, other things were said, I made a declaration,” she had intended ending at that point but somehow finds herself blurting out, “I meant what I said.”

A smile tugs at the corner of Lynette’s lips and she cants her head to the side before replying, “I’m glad. So what do we do about how awkward we are feeling around one another?”

“That’s why I came over, so we could talk and sort this out.”

“See I was thinking it would be easier if I just jumped you here and now.”

“Lynette!” her tone is reproachful yet she does feel that the idea has some merit even if she would never admit as much.

“It was just a suggestion. So talking it is.” Lynette heads off towards the couch but stops when it becomes clear that Bree isn’t following her, she doesn’t speak but she does raise her eyebrows in question.

“I don’t want to be on the sofa, I know it’s silly but that is where you were dressed in a costume waiting for him.”

Lynette doesn’t comment, she just moves to the kitchen but again Bree is hesitant, “What now?”

“I’m assuming that this is where you were when our conversation took place and I’m not sure that I want to be there either.”

Lynette shrugs but doesn’t look perturbed, in fact Bree is sure that there is a devious gleam in the blonde’s eyes, “So I am guessing the laundry is a major no?” Bree doesn’t reply, she is too busy fighting the heat that is rushing to her cheeks but Lynette doesn’t seem to need a verbal response, “Upstairs it is then.”

“I don’t want to be in your bedroom and it seems inappropriate to be in the boys' room.”

Lynette lets out a frustrated growl and deliberately turns her back on her, Bree fights the urge to flee, afraid that she will only offend Lynette further if the conversation continues, “I’m not trying to upset you, I want you to look at me.”

“I just thought that if I turned around, it could be more like when we are on the phone or if you like I could get the boys' walkie talkies.”

“Don’t belittle me.”

“I’m trying to help you feel more comfortable but obviously that’s not working,” she grabs Bree’s hand and pulls her along after her until they are both sitting on the stairs, “So will this do?”

“It’s fine. So how have you been?” she cringes at the inane question and avoids looking up to see Lynette’s reaction, instead she focuses her gaze on their still joined hands.

“You know, same old, same old, Jezebel the husband stealer has got Tom working with her on an account that will mean them going to Hawaii together, but other than that, things are okay.”

“Her name can not be Jezebel.”

“It is now,” Lynette’s tone makes it clear that there is no room for debate

“Fine. Well I see you your Jezebel and raise you an I have had to tell George I can not be his friend anymore because he lied about having feelings for me and he had an erection in public,” she is surprised that she was actually able to get the last part of that sentence out.

“You caused him to loss control of his body functions, that’s fabulous.”

“Lynette this is not funny, it was mortifying.”

“I’m sorry,” the sincerity of Lynette’s apology is somewhat questionable given that she collapses into a fit of giggles. Bree decides that she really isn’t ready for this kind of humiliation and attempts to stand but Lynette pulls her back down, “I’ll try and be good, I promise. So how did this happen?”

“We were playing miniature golf and I was attempting to interfere with his concentration so I,” so lets go of Lynette’s hand and moves her fingers up Lynette’s back in what she thinks is a reasonable facsimile of her actions on the day, that is until she reaches Lynette’s neck and her hand begins to absently massage and stroke. She leans over and whispers, “I’ve missed you,” and as far as faithful re-enactments go she takes comfort in the fact that that at least part of one of the words is the same as what she said to George but she definitely entered into the arena of poetic licence when she began biting Lynette’s earlobe and sucking on the soft flesh there.

“Mmmmmm I’m not so sure that you should be mad at George, I don’t think that he can be held accountable for his actions because I have gotta tell you that if it were anatomically possible I think I would have an erection right now.”

She pulls away from Lynette, “I didn’t, I mean not like that, it’s you, I couldn’t stop myself with you that is, not with him, I don’t think I am making a whole lot of sense.”

Lynette reaches up and places a finger over Bree’s lips, “It’s okay baby, I know but that doesn’t mean that I wanted you to stop what you were doing.”

“I came here to talk and that’s what I want to do.”

“Alright but for the record I remain firmly in favour of jumping you right here, right now.”

Bree valiantly ignores the suggestion, “I just don’t see why he had to lie, he was meant to be my friend, he says he’s in love with me, how could he do this to me?”

“I’m not sure that I am the right person to ask, I’m not exactly unbiased.”

“Because of you and I were just meant to be friends and yet here we are?”

“Well that and the fact that I am clearly not able to resist your charms so I can’t really blame him, I know how easy it is to love you but I have got a trick with a knife that I’m learning for Jezebel and if you like, I can add George to the list of victims.”

“I’m not sure how I feel about your list comprising solely of your rivals, it seems like it’s more about you than about me.”

“Well other than Tom, whom I am not planning on knifing, who would be your rival? Is Rex interested in anyone? I am willing to expand the list to three.”

She tries not to laugh and leans over to place a kiss on Lynette’s temple, “Thank you for the offer but I’m fine and you don’t need to cut George either – I need you around, not in prison and I guess it’s more that I am disappointed with him than angry. You know, I really did want him to be my friend, we had so much in common, I mean just the other day we had a delightful discussion about how tastless it is that people use ‘Omio Babbino Caro’ as a wedding song,” at Lynette’s blank look she feels the need to clarify, “It’s by Puccini.”

“Yeah, not really my thing, I don’t really go to the theatre, I did see Cats once, it didn’t do much for me. So do you want me to feign interest cause I can do that - the song’s inappropriate?”

“I don’t want you to pretend to like the things that I like. It’s probably why I was happy to have him in my life, I could talk about those things with him and I don’t really have anyone else that I can do that with.”

Lynette pulls Bree’s face around gently so that she is looking into her eyes, “Would you have been happier if you could have fallen in love with him?”

“It might have been easier but I don’t think it would have been better, it’s just that it seems cruel that I fall for people who don’t share my interests.”

“So you don’t love me for my mind?” despite her words, Lynette looks playful

“That’s not what I meant.”

“I’m not upset, I am totally okay with being worshipped for my body.” She learns closer and her breath is hot against Bree’s ear, “We could go upstairs now and I would prove to you just how little it bothers me.”

“That’s not going to happen. We have to be at my place soon and our first time is not going to be a quickie,” She winces and wishes she could shower for even having said that word, “and it is not going to be in your bed, I want it to be perfect”

“Bree it doesn’t have to be all candles and rose petals, it will be special because it’s us. You don’t have to make a big production out of it”

“There are so many things I will never get to do with you, I should at least be able to woo you a little.”

“I don’t need wooing, I’m already yours. Bree, I am not upset that we are not going to go on dates, we don’t need to go a-courting it’s one of the reasons that it doesn’t matter that I don’t care about opera, that life is not what we will be about.”

“Regardless we are not doing this now.” Lynette’s bottom lip protrudes and Bree does her best to ignore it. “I may love you.”

“May?” Lynette continues to pout.

“I possibly love you,” she counters before biting down on Lynette’s lip. 

To her credit, Lynette sticks to her guns and does not retract her bottom lip, in fact if anything she has pushed it further forward. She makes a sound that Bree thinks is, “possibly?” but it’s hard to be sure from the garbled syllables that have been produced.

“I definitely love you but I also know you and I think you would feel bad if we were to use your bed,” she doesn’t mention the fact that she has seen Lynette kissing Tom goodbye lately and that she is sure that the bed is being put to good use.

“Oh my god, you are worried that the sheets won’t be clean.”

It is infuriating that Lynette knows her so well, this is certainly something that has crossed her mind and while she may be willing to share Lynette if the only other option is not to have Lynette at all, she is not going to lie with her on sheets that bear physical evidence of this fact, “It has occurred to me.”

“We could always put new sheets on before we begin, although I tend to think that might kill the spontaneity and I hate to think about the extra washing that this will result in but given that your place has the problem of Rex and I can’t imagine that I am going to be able to convince you to move outside of the bedroom, at least not at first, I am willing to do the additional work – I just want you to know the sacrifices that I will be making.”

“If it helps I could bring over my own sheets and I will do the washing.”

“That is the weirdest thing anyone has offered to do for me.”

“I wasn’t meaning to be weird, I was trying to be practical.”

“See practical is not really a word that I want to associate with our sex life.”

“Okay, pragmatic then.”

“Not helping.”

“This is not about my need for control, well at least mostly it’s not, you talk about spontaneity but that isn’t really an option for us, we have to contend with our husbands’ movements and then there are your kids because they will at least need to be asleep if not out of the house.”

“Which is why I keep pointing out that now is the perfect time, no husbands, no kids, what could be better?” she punctuates her words by pulling Bree’s head to hers and kissing her soundly. Bree doesn’t resist the kiss, after all she did promise Lynette that there would be some serious kissing the next time they were alone, in fact she moves to take control, pushing Lynette back so that she is against the railing and releasing Lynette’s lips so that she can plunder her neck. She suckles against Lynette’s pulse point, careful not to use too much pressure else she leave a mark. She has always abhorred so called love bites and felt that they were sign of lack of class but she has to admit that she finds it hard to fight the temptation to brand Lynette – she finds herself thinking about the fact that it wouldn’t be so hard to hide, Lynette tends to wear over-shirts with high collars and that hiding it from Tom would mean that Lynette would have to keep some physical distance from him and she can’t see that that would be bad but she knows that is selfish and ultimately it may make Lynette angry with her despite the fact that Lynette is currently pushing down on her head it want seems like an effort to communicate that she wants the force being used to increase. It’s somewhat unsettling that it’s only the thought that she may anger Lynette, rather than the many other good reasons that she shouldn’t do this, that keeps her from leaving a blemish. She returns her attention to Lynette’s lips instead, melding their mouths together and running her fingers through blonde silk. Lynette has not exactly been an inactive participant but Bree had been too busy debating her own actions to track the progress of Lynette’s hands after they let go of her head and so she is somewhat surprised to find her cardigan being pushed off her shoulders, as she wasn’t even aware that Lynette had managed to undo all the buttons. She is immobilised by her shock and feels as though she is watching herself from a distance as Lynette’s hands trace over her torso, it all seems so unreal, she could almost convince herself this isn’t happening but Lynette’s fingers are leaving trails of fire in their wake. She had been worried that without the aid of clothes, with the loss of her carefully engineered veneer, that Lynette may not find her attractive but Lynette seems mesmerised and then confirms her approval by murmuring, “So beautiful,” before reaching around to undo Bree’s bra. Bree tries not to think about the ease with which Lynette performed that act and the implications of her being so seemingly adept at divesting other women of their clothing.

“Stop, we have to stop, we have to go our we will be late,” she doesn’t tell Lynette that being late doesn’t seem quite the disaster that it usually does or how tempted she is to just stay here with her but her watch confirms that their time really is up, “in fact we need to go now, I have to finish off making the punch.”

“You could just cancel the poker game, you know?” Lynette’s words are preposterous, she can’t believe that Lynette would even think that she was capable of cancelling an event on such short notice and her incredulity must be evident on her face as Lynette quickly continues, “So obviously not. Just give me a minute I have to go and fix my hair.”

“We really don’t have time for that and your hair looks fine,” Lynette’s hair is wild and matches perfectly with her flushed skin and kiss swollen lips and Bree honestly believes that Lynette has never looked more beautiful.

“We can go, I can always use your hairbrush when we get to your place.”

“Maybe you should go upstairs and do it now.”

“Jesus Bree, you put your tongue in my mouth and yet you are worried that I might contaminate your hair brush!”

“Don’t talk to me like that and please don’t make what we do sound so crude.” Lynette doesn’t apologise but she does stroke Bree’s hair and kisses the crown of her head before going upstairs. Bree busies herself with redressing and by the time Lynette returns there is no evidence to suggest that she was so recently in a state of undress. Instead of leaving Lynette sits herself back down on the bottom step and looks at Bree expectantly. “Lynette we really have to go.”

“Could you sit down, I have something that I want to give you,” she looks uncharacteristically nervous and as a result Bree finds herself sitting down as requested. “Put you hand out.”

“Lynette we really don’t have time for games.”

Lynette is not deterred, “Put you hand out.” Bree realises that it will be quicker if she just complies and so she opens her palm and awaits Lynette’s next move. Lynette looks at her own feet as she reaches over and drops a key in Bree’s hand. “It’s probably silly and it’s mainly symbolic, it’s not like you can really use it, with Tom and all, you are still going to need to knock or call but I want you know that I want to give to you as much as I am able.”

Bree looks down at the irregular metal object surprised at the lump that has formed in her throat, “It’s not silly.”

“You don’t think it’s seedy? I don’t want this to be seedy.”

“No and just so you know I don’t think want we are doing is seedy, tawdry yes but not seedy.”

“I can live with tawdry but I was hoping for torrid,” she replies as she catapults herself onto Bree forcing the redhead back onto the steps. Bree’s lungs feel empty but she is not sure is this is from the impact or from Lynette’s lips that are currently attached to her mouth, stealing her air. She is splayed across several steps which are jutting into her body in strange places and she knows she should feel uncomfortable but she doesn’t – may be the lack of oxygen is impairing her senses or may be it’s just that Lynette is on top of her kissing her passionately and that has short circuited her brain. She is embarrassed to note that it is Lynette that breaks off the kiss, “So are we going or what, cause I am very much in favour of staying right here.”

“We have to go, I’ll still be there when we go across the street you know?”

“I know but over there you’ll be hostess Bree, wife Bree, perfect neighbour Bree, the women currently underneath me will get suppressed and there will be no kissing so I like it better here.” Her position having been made clear she gets up and pulls Bree with her.

“I don’t mean to change I just don’t know how not to but I am willing to hold your hand on the walk over and I promise you that you only need to call the next time Tom is away and the kids are asleep and I will gather my sheets and let myself in with my key.”

Lynette’s only reply is an illuminating smile as she links their fingers and leads Bree out the door. As they exit the Scavo residence they are greeted with harsh sunlight and the equally disturbing sight of Edie Britt waiting on the curb, leaning against her car. Bree lets go of Lynette’s hand on reflex and Lynette can’t suppress the disappointment in her eyes as she walks away, Bree chases after her, again grasps her hand and pulls her back, “I’m sorry I just got a little rattled,” she squeezes Lynette’s hand before continuing, “I may not be able to give you everything but I do intend to keep my promises to you, besides Edie is busy thinking I am having an affair with George and she doesn’t understand female friendships so it’s not likely that she’ll think of any of me holding your hand.”

“So when you say you’ll keep your promises, the one about the sheets and the key?”

She would give anything to be able to kiss Lynette right now but as that is not an option she has to settle for telling her, “Lynette, my love, I can’t imagine anything in my life that could happen that would be more important than keeping that promise to you.”


End file.
